Saturday, June 21, 2008

Colluders and Stepford Wives

I've got the girl positive music blaring, and it is now time to let off a little steam.  When it comes to misogynistic men, I generally consider them a lost cause. I have seen rabid dogs that I would rather converse with. Of course they will claim that they only really want equality, however in actuality what they want is to hold on to their power.  This is not surprising, as no group in history has willingly given up their power without a struggle.  My goal is to attack them at their root.  Just like most things in this world, women form the support network for these angry, inane twits.  They point to their colluders and stepford wives as evidence that they don't really hate women. Look, I can say cunt, and my deluded, Stockholm syndrome girlfriend is fine with it. It's just a word. See you are just a whiny feminist. See how grateful she is to be in the presence of my handsome dick.  Now watch me puff out my chest, and pluck the one hair I have growing, that is a testament to my masculine power...Unga bunga babe.

If you want to knock these idiots off of their pedestals, who we need to go after are the colluders. These twisted freaks are so used to gender performativity that if they were forced to do the support work that women traditionally perform they would be lost.  The world would be so much better off, if they would just stick to their ritualistic circle jerks, and allow the rest of the rationale people to get on with it.

These stepford wives not only perform the maintenance work that is necessary for the support of the informal and formal economy, they parrot the discourse of their oppressors.  Just like the house slaves, of the antebellum south they wrongly identify with their masters.  Guess what, no matter how many times you bend, kneel and pray you will not grow a dick.  Sure it can do neat tricks but so can a vibrator, and you never have to tell it to move to the right. 

Having a woman centered agenda does not mean that you have to hate men, and it does not mean that you have to turn your back on them. A man can be your friend, son, partner,your favorite fuck stick for all I care, but making women a priority means that men no longer get to run the show.  Making women a priority says I care about things like rape, domestic abuse, employment equity, poverty, family and education.  Do the aforementioned matter to some men...yes, but for the majority of men they do not have the same totalizing effect as they do on women.

From the moment your mother handed you your first little purse, and told you that good girls cross their legs, you have been trained to believe that 'woman' constitutes one thing, subservient to the will of men. You don't need to be a sinner or a saint, but you do need to decolonize your mind.  Ask yourself who benefits largely from your labor, and dedication. Why is it that women are sluts or whores, and men just spread their wild oats?  How come a man is a king of his castle, and a woman is only a goddess when she is on her knees? Why are your genitals considered foul, and a mans are a symbol of strength? (though a swift kick would disprove that)

I'm going to let you in on a little known secret, women matter. Despite the hegemonic role that men play globally, the labor of women is necessary to keep this little blue planet from going completely off kilter.  I know that everywhere you turn women are minimized and reduced to accessories, but we are the foundation of all that matters.  It is on our shoulders that civilizations have risen and fallen, and it is from our wombs that life continues to be nurtured. It is only on the urging of the feminist movement that men have increased the time that they dedicate to child rearing.  Now they scream about equal access, so quickly forgetting that there was a time when the average father didn't even know how to change a diaper, or boil a pot of water. But that was the manly way...hunt, and then abdicate domestic responsibilities.  I know that you have been raised to value the hunk of raw meat that was provided, but remember that slab of meat remained inedible until it was cooked by a woman.

It is comforting to fall back on traditional belief patterns because it is easier than fighting the status quo, and not all of those that enter battle return unscathed.  When, strolling down the aisles at Zehrs so anesthetized that you don't know whether or not you are choking from the bile of dissent rising in your throat, or the anger from being unable to undo the life long straight jack you were fitted with, just for having the supposed misfortune of being born with a vagina, remember you have an image to maintain.  Good girls don't resist, good girls are wives and mothers without an identity of their own. Don't get angry at the injustice because then you will be nothing but a dirty feminist. 

Swallow those salty tears as rape apologists tell you that all women ask for it anyway.  Turn your back when a husband slaps his wife around for the thousandth time, and the police just walk away.  Bury your pride because if you end up a single mother when your hunky hero trades you in for a younger model, that trait will do you no good when you apply for food stamps.  Finally make sure that you don't miss your pole dancing lessons because you know that it is your responsibility to remain sexy and in shape, while he diligently works to increase his second chin.  Most of all don't listen to that insistent voice in your head that keeps saying, is that it, did I take a wrong turn somewhere? Life is not somewhere over the rainbow.  Wake up! Considering the alternative, being a dirty feminist might not be so bad.

9 comments:

lujlp said...

A few things

Guess what, no matter how many times you bend, kneel and pray you will not grow a dick. Sure it can do neat tricks but so can a vibrator, and you never have to tell it to move to the right.
>>Are you saying that a sex toy is better than a man becuse it takes too much effort on your part to comunicate?

Having a woman centered agenda does not mean that you have to hate men, and it does not mean that you have to turn your back on them.
>> But have a man centered agenda make you a misogonist, or a colluder or a traitor, right?

A man can be your friend, son, partner,your favorite fuck stick for all I care, but making women a priority means that men no longer get to run the show.
>> Guess what, just because a few men 'run the show' doesnt mean all men benefit

Making women a priority says I care about things like rape, domestic abuse, employment equity, poverty, family and education. Do the aforementioned matter to some men...yes, but for the majority of men they do not have the same totalizing effect as they do on women.
>> BULLSHIT. Just a second ago you said that men are you farthers, brothers, ect. Are you really so deluded that you belive that men dont give a shit about what happens to their daughters and sisters and mothers?

Why are your genitals considered foul, and a mans are a symbol of strength?
>> If that is ture why do more women refue to preform oral sex according to surveys?

(though a swift kick would disprove that)
>> SO violence against women bad but violence against men is just making a point?

It is only on the urging of the feminist movement that men have increased the time that they dedicate to child rearing. Now they scream about equal access, so quickly forgetting that there was a time when the average father didn't even know how to change a diaper, or boil a pot of water.
>> It was also at that time that women didnt file for divorce use the court to prevent a man from seing his kids, plus women werent working at that time and only one income was supporting the household

But that was the manly way...hunt, and then abdicate domestic responsibilities.
>> Yea god forbid a man risk his life to provide for his familly

Good girls don't resist, good girls are wives and mothers without an identity of their own. Don't get angry at the injustice because then you will be nothing but a dirty feminist.
>>And good boy dont cry, good boys hide their emotions and are storng for their loved ones, good boys dont fight back, good boys soilder thru the hardships, dont complain and provide for their famillies no matter what

Swallow those salty tears as rape apologists tell you that all women ask for it anyway.
>> And be sure and blame every man for the bullshit notion of less than 1% of the population, but when a guy is falsey accused and has his life ruined at least he learned a lesson

Turn your back when a husband slaps his wife around for the thousandth time, and the police just walk away.
>>Again bullshit, ever see that 20/20 special? guy harassing woman gets challanged, woman beating on guy gets cheers.

Bury your pride because if you end up a single mother when your hunky hero trades you in for a younger model, that trait will do you no good when you apply for food stamps.
>> WOmen file the majority of divorce decrees

Finally make sure that you don't miss your pole dancing lessons because you know that it is your responsibility to remain sexy and in shape, while he diligently works to increase his second chin.
>>Again bullshit - men are more visually simulated than women, it is a biological fact deal with it, it is both partners responsibility to stay inshape and attracitve for each other

Anonymous said...

while drawing attention to misogynist aren't you in fact being a misandrist, and therefore under your own logic be a lost cause?

Ebony Intuition said...

"Sure it can do neat tricks but so can a vibrator, and you never have to tell it to move to the right. "

Lol...Great post

Renee said...

@lujlip as usual more nonsense. You begin to bore me..Men are oppressed whoa is me.

Are you saying that a sex toy is better than a man becuse it takes too much effort on your part to comunicate?
No actually I'm saying that you don't have to be dependent on a man for sexual pleasure

But have a man centered agenda make you a misogonist, or a colluder or a traitor, right?

When your mens right agenda starts off my telling the world how oppressed men are because of feminism ah yeah it does. Don't like it, too bad.

Guess what, just because a few men 'run the show' doesnt mean all men benefit
Clearly you have no understanding of how privilege works. It can be mitigated by things like class and race however even those aspects do not completely remove privilege.

BULLSHIT. Just a second ago you said that men are you farthers, brothers, ect. Are you really so deluded that you belive that men dont give a shit about what happens to their daughters and sisters and mothers?

Says the mens rights activist. You can care about someone and still make decisions that are not in the best interest of your loved one. For example a father that has a different curfew for his children based in gender loves his kids equally but he is still oppressing his daughter because she is the one who is able to get pregnant.

If that is ture why do more women refue to preform oral sex according to surveys?
Perhaps because we got tired of the double standard. For every ten times a man receives oral sex he performs it three times. Want head, give head... BTW my commentary had to so with the social construction of genitalia and nothing to do with the sexuality that we associate with it.

It was also at that time that women didnt file for divorce use the court to prevent a man from seing his kids, plus women werent working at that time and only one income was supporting the household

Actually men have less free time than they ever had before. The average American is working longer hours yet now that feminism is active they can suddenly find the time to have a conversation with their kids...

Again bullshit, ever see that 20/20 special? guy harassing woman gets challanged, woman beating on guy gets cheers.

ANd this matters because men routinely are the victims of domestic violence right???

WOmen file the majority of divorce decrees
Based on whose actions???

Again bullshit - men are more visually simulated than women, it is a biological fact deal with it, it is both partners responsibility to stay inshape and attracitve for each other

Actually women are just as visually stimulated men have just dominated sexual discourse due to imbalance in power that exists. Of course it is both partners respobsibility to remain in shape but until just recently men have never had body image issues, and even those that do make up a tine % of the population.

Ok once again that was way to easy...moving onwards now.

Sandalstraps said...

Making women a priority says I care about things like rape, domestic abuse, employment equity, poverty, family and education. Do the aforementioned matter to some men...yes, but for the majority of men they do not have the same totalizing effect as they do on women.
>> BULLSHIT. Just a second ago you said that men are you farthers, brothers, ect. Are you really so deluded that you belive that men dont give a shit about what happens to their daughters and sisters and mothers?


I've been dropping by from time to time, but have not yet left a comment because, frankly, I am a man, and this is a difficult conversation for well-intentioned men to enter. Men are sadly used to dominating such conversations, offering decrees from on high as though our experience represented something more authoritative, more rational, an more objective. I want to avoid such patriarchal nonsense. So it is hard to find a point of entry into such conversations, hard to offer my point of view, without falling into the easy trap of privilege, making decrees from on high.

However, with respect to the passage quoted above, I think I do have something to offer.

I care about those issues. I really do. In fact, I may care as much as any man is able to care. Women I know, women I love, have been victims of sexual violence and domestic violence. And that pains me.

But however much I want to care about those issues, and however much empathy I can muster up for those women I know who have been wounded by the violence of misogonistic patriarchy, I am certain that I do not, cannot, care as much as the women I know who have been wounded. I am certain that I do not, cannot, care as much as the women I know who stand to be wounded in the future.

These issues affect me, sure. But they do not affect me as much as they affect my wife, my mother, my niece, and other female loved ones.

Every man should be able to admit as much, because it is so obviously true.

Well-intentioned men no doubt do care very much what happens to their female loved ones. But we don't have as much at stake, because it is not our bodies that are under attack, and it is not our minds being conditioned to accept the abuse.

Renee said...

But however much I want to care about those issues, and however much empathy I can muster up for those women I know who have been wounded by the violence of misogonistic patriarchy, I am certain that I do not, cannot, care as much as the women I know who have been wounded. I am certain that I do not, cannot, care as much as the women I know who stand to be wounded in the future.

These issues affect me, sure. But they do not affect me as much as they affect my wife, my mother, my niece, and other female loved ones.

Every man should be able to admit as much, because it is so obviously true.


Thank you so much for this. I cannot tell you how much your words touched me. Every feminist man who owns his privilege and speaks as an ally warms my heart and gives me hope for us as a species. Please feel free to comment at anytime.

professor what if said...

Great post! Funny as hell and so on point. Hurray for the dirty feminists! Down with male-privilege apologists!

Curry said...

Love these "Womanist Musings."

To the critical voices: Hell-o. And I do mean hell, the hell males have made.

Male apologists, face the facts. If the global statistics about men's violence against women were converted to any country's in-group's ethnic violence against a minority, the world's male-led liberals would be crying "genocide" and sending medical teams of volunteers to mop up the blood.

If male dominance and violence in general were not attenuated by men raping and otherwise sexually abusing women, the rates of man-on-man violence would be even higher. We are dealing with mutation or madness in males. The results, without attribution of cause, are in the news, every day.

Genetics or culture, so-called nature or nurture, we generate a false dichotomy in worrying about what causes male insanity. Whether or not gender is genetic or culturally caused, male violence and womankind's sad efforts to accommodate and stay alive are a reality. We need to focus there. We need a solution to being less than chattel in the common male mind. Most men care about their cars.

If we as women do not care about ourselves, nobody will. Men are the best liars on the planet. They always say what we want to hear, to keep us working for them, on our knees, mopping up our own blood.

zobabe73 said...

Sandalstraps,
I love it when men like you post! It makes me smile.
Sometimes it seems like all the male perspective I see on these issues comes from little "what about teh menz" trolls like lujlp.
Thanks!