Policing The Muff

Is anyone else as irritated as me?  We are entering the summer season and everywhere you turn there is an advertisement about waxing bikini lines, trimming the nether regions, or just in general making sure your main girl is in the best shape possible.  In pop culture every time we engage with a vagina it is about making sure that it is esthetically pleasing for men. It is very rarely about the vagina, the giver of life, or the center of my sexual pleasure, nope it’s this wild out of control animal that needs to be trimmed, and stylized.  I’m surprised there is no speculation on what we feed the wild beast.

Even spaces that you think are safe from the whole trim the beaver brigade have been invaded. I went over to essence.com only to find under the category of relationships (yes you read that right) a survey on how women deal with the “hair down there”….ooooohhh the down there. Can’t call it a vagina until it is properly stylized, nope it’s the wild mysterious down there.  Just to have a show of some kind of gender neutrality the survey is divided into male and female. My favorite line under men is “Fellas, we haven’t forgotten about you. We want to know what you like too when it comes to your partner’s personal maintenance!”  Yeah that is right, personal maintenance cause you know a vagina is work, its so complicated, not easy, and simple like a penis. The fact that we are attaching emotions to our genitals similarly to the way that we attach them to people is not at all problematic now is it? I get it, men are from mars and women are from Venus. One is simple and the other complicated, and in need of discipline.

Where is the advertising dedicated to get men to trim, or wax their pubic hair? Ooops silly me, conforming the body is a woman’s realm.  How could I have missed the near perfection of the penis?  Ingrained in these messages is the idea that ‘woman’ as she is naturally created is always imperfect and in need of change.  We are to ignore that fact that corporations create these images, and spend millions of dollars encouraging, and maintaining insecurity in women. Presenting women as beautiful in their natural form, is counter to capitalism as no profit could be generated.  It is far better to push the idea that women are in need of enhancement or alteration, as that will ultimately lead  us to spend our few disposable dollars trying to rectify some perceived fault that mother nature created in us.  So we get, too much hair is unhygienic, or it is visually unappealing to have pubic hair, or what is that smell emanating from you. If somehow on your pursuit to perfection you end up with those unappealing little bumps, no need to worry they have a cream for that too. Everything involving the vagina is foul and need of change. If you don’t keep your temple of love in tip top shape, no one will want to visit.  So remember ladies it is your responsibility to make sure that your vagina is the same as some prepubescent girl because anything else is an affront. You are a dirty, dirty girl, look around you, there are many ads dedicated to telling you so.

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