Friday, December 26, 2008

For My Brothers

Transcript below the fold

There have been no words no poetry in ashes south of canal, no prose and truck driving debree and DNA.   Evident out my window an abstract reality, sky where once was steel, smoke where once was flesh. Please God let it be a mistake,the pilots heart the planes engine.  God, please don't let it be anyone who looks like my brothers. I don't know how bad a life has to break in order to kill.  I've never been so hungry that I willed hunger.  I've never been so angry as to want a gun over a pen.  Not really, even as a woman, a Palestinian never this broken.  Ricardo on the radio said in his accent thick as yuca, I will feel so much better when the first bombs drop over there.  A woman crying in a car, parked stranded and hurt, I offered comfort.  A hand she did not see before she said, we're gonna burn them so bad. My hand went to my head, and my head to the dead Iraqi children, the dead in Nicaragua, in Rwanda who vied with fake sport wrestling for Americas attention.  People saying this was bound to happen, let's not forget US transgressions.  Hold up I live here, these are my friends and family.  Me in those buildings, do not support Americas bullying, can I just have half a second to feel bad.  Thank you woman who saw me brinking cool and blinking tears. Open her arms before she asked do you want a hug.  A big white woman, and her embrace only people with flesh can offer.  My brother is in the navy I said and we're Arabs.  Wow you got double trouble, word.  One more person ask me if I knew the hijackers.  One more motherfucker ask me what navy my brother is in. One more person assume that no Arabs or Muslims were killed.  Assume that they know me, or that I represent a people or that a people represent evil, or that evil is as simple as a flag or words on a page. We did not vilify white men when McVeigh bombed Oklahoma, give out his family's address, or blame the church, or blame the bible, or Pat fucking Robertson.  Networks air footage of Palestinians dancing in the street, no apology that hungry children are bribed with treats that turn their teeth brown.   Correspondents edit images, archives facilitate lazy journalism. When we talk about holy books, hooded men and death, why never mention the KKK,  If there are any people on earth who understand how New York is feeling right now, they are in the West Bank and the Gaza Strip.  Bush has waged war on a man once openly funded by the CIA.  I've read to many books to believe what I'm told.  I don't give a fuck about Bin Laden, his vision of the world don't represent me or the people love, but I've signed petitions for years to out the US sponsored taliban. Shit is complicated and I don't know what to think, but I know who will pay women, mostly coloured and poor will have to bury children, support themselves through grief.  In America it will be those of us who refuse blanket attacks on the shivering, who work towards social justice and opposing hateful policies.  Either you are with us or with the terrorists, meaning keep your people under control and resistance censored, meaning we got the loot and the nukes.  Never felt less American and more Brooklyn these days.  These stars and stripes represent the dead as citizens first not as family, not lovers.  My skin is real thin, my eyes are darker, the future holds little light.  My brother is a man now, on alert, praying five times a day that the orders he will take are righteous and now weigh his soul down from the afterlife.  Both my brothers, my heart stop, not a beat disturbs my fear.  Muslim gentle men, born in Brooklyn and their faces are of the Arab man all eyelashes and nose, and beautiful colour and stubborn hair. What will their lives be like now, over there is over here.  Across the river burning rubber and limbs, rescuers traumatized, skyline brought back to human size.  No longer taunting Gods, I cried when I saw those buildings collapse upon themselves like a broken heart. I have never owned pain that needs to spread like that.  There is no poetry in this, causes and effects symbols and ideologies, mad conspiracy here, information we'll never know, there is death here and promises we'll never know.  There is life here, anyone hearing this is breathing,maybe hurtin but breathing for sure. If there is any light to come it will shine from the eyes of those who look for peace and justice after the rubble and rhetoric are cleared and the phoenix has risen.  Affirm life, affirm life, we've got to carry each other now.  You are either with life or against it, affirm life. 

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